Luxuries Of the Less Guilty Man

Yo me shuggers, im back atcha, belching sober fumes from the porch. And lemme tell thee; man which denies himself humble luxury is a fool. And a twit. And probably smells of Jaffa Cakes. What earthly good is greeting death after a lifetime of self imposed abstinence toward life's finer things? There are no pockets on shrouds mun! Don't we all (shirkers and malingerers not included) work hard enough to be deserving of something nice at the day's end? Ye carrotte ye sticke! Rich reward! Mark my words and mark them well: there is no shame in buying the good things in life and one should never be embarrassed about doing so. I myself adore the Welsh caviar, Laverbread and Jagermeister, both not cheap but why should I refrain from buying them just because Joe No-Shoes cannot afford to do so? Ye poppycockes! What absurdity is this? Ive earned the right to have my share of luxury and will thank others not to try and make me guilty for having it. Ye Gods what sullen monsters this world creates through foolish, mythical ideals spawned from a heart that never was, nor ever could be.